stuttering + memory lapses
I’ve noticed that the days in which my anxiety is slumbering and not out to bite my ass, it’s significantly easier to converse with other people in social and professional settings. This makes sense, since an anxiety-filled mind is exhausting itself, and that often inhibits the brain from retreiving memories and words. You’re in a light debate with friends on topics you know very well, and suddenly you find yourself freezing mid-sentence because you cannot for the life of yourself remember what the f that word is, and now you’re painfully aware of the pause you’ve caused in the conversation, so instead of continuing you just say a conclusive “yeah” and miss your moment to express knowledge you very much have inside that impossible brain of yours. Now you’re on edge to even speak again so when you finally do, you begin to stutter. Forget, stutter, lower confidence, forget, stutter. Moments of speaking have become terrifying, and they are central to every part of everyday life.
To be honest this is something I’ve struggled with a lot recently, and it burns my throat because there are so many smart thoughts that are not coming across, and I feel perceived as dumb, unprepared, unequal at the table. So instead of facing it I’ve begun to avoid situations in which I have to speak improvised, which as you can imagine has been extremely deteriorating for my health and any chance that I better these setbacks. So I’m soon returning to three things that helped me in such a rut a couple of years ago:
mindset
You are not lesser than, and if people think you are because of this, there’s a plethora of other ways you are going to show otherwise; if you won’t see them again, their opinion really doesn’t matter.
mouth piece
This is an unfortunate default subsection title for this post. Instead of ending what you’re saying when you forget a word or thought, signal that you do in fact have more to say, “damnit, my brain turned off for a sec, more to say later” and you CAN say it later in whatever format is more comfortable, you don’t cut yourself short from the conversation, and you show that there is more to you than a single moment.
follow your feet
Step away from the conversation and focus on something else. A lot of the time, the word, idea, or response will come back to you.
I am not a mental health professional — each post is meant to provide 3 tips that have helped me through everyday situations with anxiety. Please seek professional help if you need it.